Posts tagged ‘Joe Paterno’
Joe Paterno Has Died
Just three short months after being fired from the same coaching position which he held for the previous 87 years, and only two months after he was diagnosed with lung cancer, Joe Paterno has died. In what was defined as “complications” to the treatment of his cancer, although was probably due to the cancer itself, [...]
Joe Paterno Has Lung Cancer
In a strange turn of events, karma rears it’s ugly head and I’m looking at you Joe Paterno. The Penn State coach who now infamously did or did not say something about a member of his coaching staff raping little boys in his showers has now been diagnosed with lung cancer. Usually it takes at [...]
ESPN Has Breaking News
ESPN, which should be called E!SPN because of how they treat the sports world like a tabloid instead of focusing on actual sporting news, has new breaking news on the Jerry Sandusky-Penn State scandal. Scrolling their news ticker during Monday Night Football’s telecast, viewers were told that Jerry Sandusky “should not have showered with those [...]
Ashton Kutcher Can’t Even Tweet By Himself
It’s long been thought that Ashton Kutcher is a dumbass who can’t think for himself and really has a difficult time functioning like a normal human being. I watched Punk’d once and the guy couldn’t sit still for a complete thought. He just kept waiving his hands in the air and say things like ‘Oh [...]
Joe Paterno Is Good At Keeping Secrets
Because college football loves their scandals like they love having indisputable winners each and every year, Penn State has filled in with the newest form of football scandals…pedophilia. Jerry Sandusky, the team’s defensive coordinator from 1989-1999, is under investigation for taking boys from his charity – The Second Mile - and sodomizing them in the school [...]